October 5, 2017 | Posted in: Sports

Pick 12, Round 1, 2017 will haunt the Cleveland Browns Faithful for years to come.

The Plight of the Cleveland Browns has taken shape and form in QuarterBack DeShaun Watson, Round 1, Pick 12.  The guy we passed on last year, pick 2, 2016, Carson Wentz, has the Eagles 3-1 in 2017.  Dark forces brother.  Did Watson have to be so good, so quickly?  Sigh.

Hi Paul, perhaps I can be just a little more personal with this writing.  We’re already several layers deep into anonymity, this post going through two Twitter accounts, and there’s no need for me to tweet you directly because I know how Twitter works …what you see when you scroll … you only follow like 25 people, you’re kind of a famous guy … so charming with your brilliant personality, I have so much heterosexual man love for you … and this business is way too public.  No need for us to be all formal with one another.

I’m also totally in love with what you’re trying to accomplish.  The methods.  I graduated from The Miami University, the one in Ohio bruh, Miami was a University before Florida was a state.  I have an Arts Degree (history), but, come on dude, I passed Calculus.  With a B.  My document, my transcript, from a half way prestigious school, I mean, it’s not Yale, but, we have some standards down in Oxford … it shows the Richard T Farmer school of business wasn’t for me … An F in MicroEconomics?

Hire me as an advisor.  Analyst.  Analyzing players drafted between 2000-2016.  Building reports to make decisions in the Spring of 2018.  Problem is boss, Injury makes the model we’re trying to build invalid.  The invariable variable.  A constant.  When you did baseball, injury didn’t impact the #analytics the way they do in pro football.  It’s frustrating.

They have Prescott, we have Kessler.  They have Wentz, we have Peppers and Njoku.  They have Watson.  Did he Have to Do So Well so quickly?  Sigh.  It’s one of those decisions with the capability to have haunting consequences.  Houston has all the pieces to win a championship in the next two years but the draft capital traded for the selection will catch up with them eventually.  What’s going to happen in the Spring of 2018, after another 1-15 season, pick #1, Round 1, 2018 and teams are offering 12 draft picks for the selection?  The model eats draft capital, especially rounds 1-3, like potato chips.  They’re so yummy to the model’s tummy.  Add the obvious clear choice #1 QB and we, our principles, our model … are in jeopardy because people get fired in the business of pro football … a lot.

And maybe it’s okay … give me 5 minutes in front of the owner down in Jacksonville … provided the #Data is proprietary to you … and we’ll have new, better paying jobs.  I don’t imagine I would find this kind of job listed in the Plain Dealer or Craigslist.,

The model requires stability.  Big man should be the kind of owner who says things like  “Pick 8 and 22, Round 1, 2014, set our organization back 5 years.”  “Wow, does it just suck Pick 12, Round 1, 2017 is doing so well.”  Sigh.  “Isn’t that just Cleveland Browns luck DeShaun Watson is so good”

Surprising news out of Cleveland today, Quarterback Deshone Kizer is a healthy scratch.  The Browns are going with Hogan and Kessler.  After the game, it’s all about giving a young man who’s showing his grit, his determination, his effort, his ability to extend plays …. a break … take a rest kid.  We’re going to see how this week goes with this game plan offensively.  Is LT a problem this week?  Sigh.  One of the greater shames of what’s been going on in Cleveland the past 10 years will not being able to put together a competitive, playoff team during Joe Thomas’ tenure.  The left side of the offensive line anchored for Every Snap since 2007?  The model doesn’t see such things very often Paul.

This weekend, against the Jets, is Huge.  1-4.  Phew.  Because we made a change #1) we had to make and #2) saw success because we won.  Are there some B.S. rules the starting QB must be announced prior to the game?

The model requires Stability.  Firing the offensive staff and trying to teach our rookie QB a new scheme isn’t the answer.  And firing the head coach is the absolute worst decision anyone could make.  Head coach doesn’t have a problem until upper management feels all the pieces are together for playoff football and the results just aren’t happening.  Three more seasons.  The fans are committed.  Believe it or not, they understand what’s trying to be accomplished.  They understand 2018 draft capital.  They’ve seen somewhat competitive games so far.  One of the problems is we’ve gotten worse each game.  A big piece of the puzzle defensively returns this week against the Jets.  Pick 1, Round 1, 2017.  I can’t wait to see him on the field.  What about NT and LB?  It doesn’t look optimistic for them to return.  Injury makes the model invalid.  We should all be immediately terminated.

And, if you read this far, 775 words, I’m going to add … can someone from the coaching staff reach out to Jeff Fisher and discuss getting the most out of #18?  His long term deal was a terrible idea.  Of all the guys on the market, this is the guy we’re going to give 4 years, $32M?  You looked too much at the analytics and I’d say cut him today.  Certainly after the season.  Success will also be measured in “dead” money.  The business of professional football is dastardly like in Moneyball when you had to tell Tony Pena he got traded to the Tigers.  And you were right, he was an All Star.  Injury makes the model invalid but we’re going to build it anyway.  Fuck injury.

Your team deserves someone faithful.  A believer.  A believer in what you’re trying to accomplish.  The analytics say 6 of the next 12 games are “winnable”.  Can we start Sunday?  It would make things a whole lot easier.

$50 an hour, I’ll bill you 34 total hours between 10-6-2017 and 11-15-2017.

 

 

 

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